?A baby mosquito came back after its 1st fight.
Dad asked: how did u feel?
He replied: Dad it was wonderful.
Everyone was clapping for me
Moral: Take everything positively

 

?A boy came running in the kitchen,
Boy:Dad, There is an ugly monster at the door
Dad(Looking at his wife):
Tell him we have already got one!

 

?A boy of 1st class to her teacher.
Do you like me?
Miss. So sweet.
Student: When should I sent my parents to your home?
Miss. Why?
Student: To talk about us.
Miss: What are you saying?
Student: For tuition.

 

?A chines couple,
Mr Hua & Mrs Hua
got twin babies after marriage.
They named them, Jo-Hua , So-Hua.
Next year they got one more baby.
They named Ye-Kia-Hua

 

?A foreigner had very spicy Indian dinner.
Next morning he came out of the toilet & said,
now i understand Why indian use water.
Tissue Can catch fire…

 

?A Love Letter from BISCUIT MAKER- Dear Marie, Today is Good Day, U r Anmol for me... But U have Crackjacked my Heart, Bcoz I have a Little Heart, Now I m in 50/50 position...

 

?A student wrote a letter
to his father from hostel:
Dear dad…!
No money,No fun.
Your son!
His father replied:
Dear son!
So sad,Very bad
Your dad!

 

?A typical student flips a coin and think.
If Head- will go to sleep.
If Tail- will watch a move.
If Stands- will listen music.
If Stays in air- will study

 

?age of drinks;
1 to 3 milk
3 to 8 cerelac
9 to 13 horlicks
14 to 25 bear
26 to 40 whisky
41 to 60 tonic
after 60 anytime
“GANGA JAL

 

?Always start your day with a lot of S E X
S-mile
E-nergy
X-citement
so make SEX a daily habit, & u'll always be SMILING!

 

?An engineering student to his sweeper brother: I have got degree, I have got knowledge, I can sit in society. What do you have?
Sweeper: I have the job.

 

?Announcement in a university:
“Will the students who parked on the driveway, please move their cars…”
20 minutes later:
“Will the 200 students who went to move 9 cars please return to their respective classes…”

 

?Are you idiot?
Why you keep sending me SMS?
Who gave my number to you?
Never message me again.
Did I ever said that.
Than why don’t you sending SMS.

 

?Beauty is not how you look, it is not how handsome u r, it is not ur figure too... Beauty is the inner self, so change ur underwear daily.

 

?Birds Birds in the sky dropped a pooty in my eye,
I don”t worry I don”t cry,
I”m just happy that cows can”t fly!

 

?Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher:
“can kids of our age have kids?”
Teacher replied ” NO Never!!”
Boy said to girl :
“see i told you not to worry!!!!”.

 

?Boy: I am not rich like rohit, I don't even have a bid car like rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about rohit..

 

?Calendar of Love
January = Rose
February = Propose
March = Gift
April = Lift
May = Chatting
June = Dating
July = Miss
August = Kiss
September = Marriage
October = Broke up
November = Rest
Decemb

 

?Can we do romance in the evening today?
I’m in a good mood
Just a little bit of kissing and biting
reply me soon!
yours lovingly
“MOSQUITO”

 

?Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business?
Student: "Father in law".

 

?Do u know similarity between Dinosaurs and Decent Girls?
Both don't exist.